Feelings Change — Avoid Emotional, Life-altering Decisions

Monique Mills, MBA, PMP
3 min readMay 12, 2019

I just read an article that talked about if something doesn’t bring you overwhelming joy, quit it. Overwhelming joy? That’s a bit much. Working out doesn’t bring me overwhelming joy, but it’s a health necessity. I may not feel like doing it at first, I have inertia to overcome, but once I’m started it’s fine.

The article went on to say that if anything causes worry, quit it, and if anything makes you feel insecure, quit it. I can list off a plethora of things that brings worry and insecurity but quitting it is not a wise decision. Having kids brings worry. You constantly worry about their well-being and the state of the world they’ll live in. If you take it back to having a baby, most moms still check to see if their baby is breathing if they’ve been sleeping for a while. Sure, that’s a form of worry, but would avoiding being a parent be worth the trade-off? I wouldn’t say so.

Sure, if there are extended periods of mentally challenging, emotionally draining circumstances that are just unhealthy for you, you should absolutely consider changing your situation. However, advising to quit everything that makes you a tad bit uncomfortable or that is not absolutely exhilarating is a bit extreme. For me, my undergraduate engineering degree was RIDICULOUSLY hard! It wasn’t just the curriculum, but all of the other circumstances around being a first-generation college student in my family. There are so many times I wanted to just quit it, but I’m so glad I didn’t. Where would I be now?

Listen, I’m not saying that there aren’t times one needs to throw in the towel. I’m just stating the claim to keep things in perspective. An extreme of just about anything is not good for us — food, exercise, worry, complaining, etc. I’m not an advocate of making critical decisions based upon your emotions. If you live long enough (not to say that I’m that “old”, but I’m old enough to know) you’ll understand, barring depressing and or other medical reasons, your emotional state and feelings vary all the time and are temporary. One minute you feel great and optimistic, and the next you could feel hopeless. That’s just life.

I wouldn’t advise anyone to make decisions based upon how they feel because feelings change as the circumstances change. Sometimes it can even be for hormonal reasons and you don’t realize it because in the moment, the feelings of the distress are real. However, even changes in hormonal levels can cause you to overemphasize…

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Monique Mills, MBA, PMP

Serial Entrepreneur — Strategy — Engineer (EE) — Tech Startup Founder —President of SMB Acqusiitions at Focused Innovation Group — CEO of TPMFocus —#womaninSTEM